As Vincent entered Catherine’s balcony, he was just about to knock on her window pane, when he turned and saw her asleep outside, in the spot, which she had so lovingly prepared for them.
Bending down to better look at this lovely woman, who was waiting for him, Vincent still found it difficult to believe this could be so. But it was true, and Vincent knew Catherine cared for him with all her heart.
Gently taking the book from her small hands, he smoothed the hair from her eyes before waking her, by softly speaking her name, "Catherine?"
Upon hearing his voice, she smiled even before she opened her eyes, and then sleepily she looked up at him and asked, "You're here. Have you been here long?"
With a soft loving voice, he replied, "Not long, I hated to wake you. You looked like an angel sleeping here."
As Catherine sat up, she held out both of her hands to welcome him, and said, "Come sit with me. I have missed you so much."
Excepting her invitation, he sat down beside her, and gathered her within his outstretched arm. Leaning, to take in the scent of her hair, he thought of how much he loved her essence. Softly, he then asked, "Missed me Catherine? To know this, touches my heart. I too have missed you."
Catherine teasingly replied, "Listen to you saying you missed me, but yet you arrived late, with out explanation."
To which Vincent bent his head, wondering how he would explain his tardiness was due to Lisa.
Vincent had no secrets from Catherine concerning Lisa, he even told her of when as adolescents, he accidentally harmed Lisa, in an amorous attempt to hold her. And kindly in response, Catherine told him, there was no shame in desiring someone.
Upon hearing Catherine did understand, the incident was not intentional, Vincent knew in his heart, Catherine was trying to convey her awareness of their desire for each other. But the guilt of that one night so long ago, left Vincent with barriers he was still fighting to tear down. Barriers which prohibited the closeness they were both longing for.
And though Catherine was an understanding and forgiving confidant, Vincent still wondered how Catherine will feel knowing he was late because of Lisa. Lisa the girl he once loved, Lisa, the old friend who had re-entered his world, and finally, Lisa, the woman who invoked all the old shameful feelings in his heart.
So carefully Vincent began, "I was late because...Lisa needed help getting settled into her old chamber. Lisa has moved back home."
Upon learning Lisa had moved back to the tunnels, Catherine couldn't breathe, and so finally finding her voice, she answered softly, "I see."
Catherine lowered her head, in an attempt to hide her shock and disappointment as she then added, "I never dreamed she would return to the tunnels to live. I guess I just assumed she would return to where ever it was she came from...but I suppose testifying as she did, she had burnt a lot of bridges...lost connections and friends...I suppose I should have seen this coming...but I didn't..."
Vincent then stood, and as he thoughtfully gazed over skyline, he answered, "Yes...I was taken aback by her plan as well."
Warily, Catherine, joined Vincent at his side, and could sense his reservations of Lisa being so nearby too, and so she hesitantly asked, "Vincent, so now since Lisa has moved back, well, I guess I am asking, what does this mean to you?"
Looking downward Vincent shakily answered, "I don't know. Having Lisa back to the tunnels brings back so many memories, good, bad, painful, joyous..."
Thoughtfully, Catherine carefully replied, "I can understand that. You grew up together, you were very close."
Vincent turned to Catherine, and with an anguished voice, he bellowed, "Why don't you just say it Catherine? I loved her, I once loved her, and now she is back. And now you are wondering, as I am, how will I handle this arrangement?"
Though Catherine tried to keep her voice strong, her quivering chin gave her away, as she answered, "Yes I am wondering, and I suppose...I am a bit frightened too. What if having Lisa back in your life awakens the feelings you once had for her? What if Lisa's nearness changes things?"
To which Vincent with emotion tried to convey, "You must know Catherine, nothing can change what we possess."
With a soft hopeful tone, Catherine expressed, "I do...on some level I do know, but still I feel I need to ask you to remember what you mean to me. I...I don't want to lose you Vincent."
And so they stood, holding one another, until Vincent carefully said, "I should go. It is late Catherine, and you need your rest."
With a sigh, Catherine reluctantly nodded, needing to agree to the late hour, which prompted Vincent to hesitantly bring up his hood, as he said, "Sleep well Catherine."
Feeling powerless to stop this feeling she had of Vincent slipping away, she returned Vincent's helpless look and replied, "You too."
Catherine then watched as Vincent made his descent, while he himself, took one last look at her, before slipping into the darkness that hid him from her sight.
Now left all alone with her uncertainties, Catherine contemplated of how Lisa and Vincent shared something, something she could not, which were memories of the past.
Was the bond she and Vincent had, strong enough to resist a temptation such as this? Catherine prayed it was.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Meanwhile, Vincent walked slowly back to his chamber, and as he passed by Jacob's, he heard his Father call out to him, inquiring, "Vincent?"
Stopping in his tracks, Vincent stepped to his threshold, and asked, "What are you doing still awake? Are you well?"
Jacob waved off the question, as if it were nonsense, and replied, "Am I well? Yes, yes my boy, I am fine. I only wanted to talk to you about Lisa. I have to confess, I host reservations about having her here."
With an anguished effort, Vincent sat down in the neighboring chair next to his Father's, and with his chin in his hands, he confessed, "I do as well Father. But we cannot turn her away. This was once her home."
Warily Jacob nodded, and said, "Yes, I agree, we cannot turn her away, but Vincent, has she changed? I think not. I feel she is still the temptress who left us years ago."
Upon hearing his Father characterise Lisa so brashly, Vincent replied, "Calling Lisa a temptress is a bit harsh isn't it Father?"
With a frustrated tone, Jacob replied, "Perhaps...but still my query still stands...has she changed?"
Standing up to pace, Vincent told his Father, "I don't know if Lisa has changed or not, but I have. I have Catherine in my life now...and I have complete and total control over my nature now..."
Vincent stopped to look down at his Father, and with a neediness, he continued, "You must know that."
To which Jacob agreeably said, "Yes, yes of course I do my boy. Still I sense unrest within you. Am I wrong?"
Humbly, Vincent knelt down at his father's side, he admitted, "Father, no, you are not wrong."
Lovingly, Jacob smoothed Vincent's troubled head, and urged, "Be strong, be strong as I know you are."
Looking up with tear clouded eyes, Vincent answered, "The memory can be a tortuous tool...as the incident with Lisa, replays in my mind, and the past haunts me so."
To which Jacob, then thoughtfully advised, "Perhaps this is a good thing...perhaps it is time to face the past...and deal with the uncertainties which you say haunt you still. It is then, and only then that you can finally put them to rest."
Knowing that dealing with the past, is a long arduous road which looms before him, Vincent looked upon his Father and agreed, "Yes perhaps that is so."
With a loving hug, Jacob said, "Leave this task for tomorrow...as for now...sleep well my son."
Solemnly, Vincent walked out of Father's chamber, knowing he had no secrets from him, knowing Father understands the demons he must fight, and loving him so much, for having faith in him to fight them.
Vincent entered his chamber, and as he approached his writing table he looked down and found a folded note written in Lisa's handwriting. It said "To Vincent". Vincent sat down and slowly unfolded the note, anticipating what it would reveal to him. He read:
Dearest Vincent,
How can I make you understand what you have meant to me all
these years, and even though I have been absent from you,
my heart hasn't been. It has been longing for my life back within
these tunnels. I know you know this to be true. I never would
have left if Father had not sent me away. I always wonder where
our paths would have led us.
Vincent, as a young girl, I always fought the way I felt about you.
I wasn't sure these feelings I had for you were right to have.
To be frank, I worried what others would have thought. But seeing
you with Catherine, it has awakened so many longings with in my
heart. Yes it has even evoked jealousies.
I envy Catherine and the closeness I suspect you share with her.
Please wake me upon your return tonight, I have so much more to
reveal to you, but wish to do it face to face.
Till we meet again
Lovingly Lisa
emotions were too raw to sort things out now. He felt it would be a betrayal to Catherine if he were
to go to Lisa tonight. So he decided, what Lisa had to say, would have to wait until tomorrow.
happened that night? Had she meant to tempt him, dancing so close, as if daring him? But still...even
if all this was so...it was his hands that injured Lisa, and for that, Vincent has not forgiven himself.
Chapter Three
| Where Rainbows End! By Sharon Holtz Chapter Two |
