Because the rhythmic flow of the Tunnels depended on everyone doing their jobs, Vincent who had designated duties of his own, could not allow himself the luxury of wallowing in his sorrow. So because of his selfless heart, he prepared to conduct his class to the children.
Vincent loved the children, and they loved him, and very much looked forward to the classes he taught. Vincent made learning exciting, and he never talked down to them, or failed to answer their many many questions...because he was a patient and a gentle teacher, he diligently answered them all.
And because the children were getting excited about the upcoming Holiday, Vincent promised to read a story about Thanksgiving. And so upon taking stock of their possible Thanksgiving themed books, Vincent chose a book by O Henry, “Two Thanksgiving Day Gentlemen” to the children.
Though he was downhearted, Vincent somehow managed to read with the enthusiasm and the excitement they expected from him, and he found this time with the children to be quite healing.
The class went well, and the children tried to be extra good, because they too were aware, a lady Vincent had met at a masquerade party, made him feel sad.
As Vincent started gathering up the books, he excused the children for the day, and it was then one of the children approached him, and asked, "Vincent?"
Kindly Vincent answered, "Yes Joshua, what is it?"
As the young boy scrunched up his nose, he asked, "Is it true you met a lady, and you love her, and she doesn't love you back, and that lady is really, really mean?"
Vincent looked downward, smiling the saddest of smiles, at the innocent straight forwardness of his question. So as Vincent took in a deep breath, he answered Joshua truthfully, and said, "Yes it is all true, except for the last part."
In disbelief, Amanda then piped up and asked, "You mean you don't think she is mean Vincent?"
To which Vincent softly replied, "No Amanda, not at all."
Joseph then added his observations, as he said, "But we heard some of the elders say she must be mean spirited to treat you like that, and make you sad."
As Vincent tousled Joseph's unruly head of hair, he quietly answered, "Well Joseph...despite all you children may hear, I will set you right, and the only true part of what you heard, is that I am saddened."
But before the children left him, they all took turns giving Vincent a hug, and the last in line, was the youngest child, and her name was Natalie. So as she approached, Vincent kindly bent down to her level, and was quite moved when she gave him a peck on the cheek, as well as a hug.
Warmly Vincent responded, "Thank you Natalie, I believe that to be just what the doctor ordered."
Natalie looked at Vincent very puzzled and said, "Father didn't order me to give you a smooch...I ordered myself!"
Vincent looked downward smiling to himself, and said, "Very well then, your kindness means even more to me then."
Vincent then looked over the bunch to tell them, "And this goes for all of you children, thank you all for caring about me...it means so much..."
It was then Zach said,"Yeah, I gotta say, when you didn't want any pancakes, we all got worried!"
Wisely, Vincent thought he better put the children at ease, and so he explained, "Understand children, caring and worrying are two different things. It is wonderful to care about another person, and show kindness, just as you have conveyed to me here today, however it does no one, especially your self any good, to worry about another or about a situation."
Confused, Zach said, "I still don't get it...what's the dif?"
Contemplating his words, Vincent replied, "When you care for someone or something, you reach out, take action, and perhaps petition over it, however when you worry, well worry is more of an act of privately mauling over it, internalizing and upsetting your belly's about it. So I only want you to know, though you care about me, you needn't worry, I will be fine..."
And so showing he now understood, Zach zealously said, "OK Vincent...I won't worry about ya, I'll just petition for ya!"
With a nod of appreciation, Vincent replied, "There you go Zach..."
The children all shouted their goodbyes, and because of the brave front Vincent put on for them today, they left feeling so much better now about his welfare.
Sitting alone now at his writing table, Vincent heaved a sigh, relieved to have a moment to sort his thoughts, however he knew this privacy would most likely be short lived, suspecting his Father was due to check on him.
No sooner had Vincent thought this, when Jacob hobbled in, as he...of course wanted to check on his son.
As he stood inside the threshold, Jacob cleared his throat, and asked, "Ahem...Vincent may I?"
To which Vincent stood, and replied, "Of course Father...I was expecting you..."
With a surprised double take shake of his head, Jacob asked, "You were?" And then realizing he was being transparent, he then stated, "Ah...well I see..."
As Jacob approached, he cleared his throat as he noted, "Ahem, I, uh, I just passed the children...what a lively crew we have...they told me how excited they were to learn about some of the Native American tribes today..."
To which Vincent politely answered, "They were quite attentive today...I believe America's history is one of their most favorite of subjects."
In reply, Jacob chuckled a bit as he warmly recalled, "Sounds like someone else I know."
Knowing Jacob was referring to himself, Vincent nodded, knowing this was true.
Jacob then with a touch of humor, hesitantly relayed, "The children also said, I should NOT be worried about the fact you did NOT come to eat any PANCAKES at brekky..."
And then more solemnly, Jacob added, "...because evidently you told them not to worry, as you were going to be just fine..."
To which Vincent confirmed, "We did have that discussion...they were concerned, and had many questions, so I felt I needed to put their minds at ease."
With a prideful nod, Jacob expressed, "I am proud of the way you are able to put everyone ahead of yourself Vincent...very proud of you indeed..."
Vincent of course appreciated his Father words, but stayed silent, as Jacob then added, "I, ah, well I was wanting to ask you about something, I understand Brigit's Father died yesterday, and I know you have a lot on your mind, but I just wanted to remind you of proper protocol. Were you planning on sending your condolences to her? Or perhaps, you already had."
Jacob's suggestion caused Vincent to be astonished at his own thoughtlessness, and with shamed surprise, he admitted, "Oh Father, it never crossed my mind. Of course you are right. I need to send word to her right away."
Surprised as well, Jacob shook his head in wonder, as he said, "Ah Vincent, mere days ago Brigit was all you thought of, and now in her time of need, you forget her. What has this Catherine done to you? I have a mind to go above and speak to her..."
At the prospect of that, Vincent stood, and demanded, "No, Father, no! The way I am feeling is not Catherine's doing...it is mine. I should not have expected the things I allowed myself to imagine. Please Father, let me deal with this in my own way...I just need time."
Jacob then relentlessly argued, "It seems to me Vincent, she could have left you a note...or something! I for one, would like to have an answer to her behaving in such a brusque manner! What kind of a person is she?"
Helplessly Vincent speculated, "Father, please I don't have the answers to your questions. Perhaps because of her gentle heart, she didn't know how to let me down obligingly."
Vincent then expressed, "There is something you must understand, and accept, that no matter what... I still care for Catherine. What's happened between us doesn't change that. I know the woman she is...and...I will always care for her...Father I love her."
As Vincent sat back down, feeling already spent for the day, he slowly pulled open a drawer of his writing table to bring out a pale piece of parchment. And as he looked up at his Father, he then said, "And you are right, I should have responded immediately to Brigit's note. Thank you for the reminder of how Brigit has been a Dear friend, and I must be there somehow for her now."
As a thought occurred to him, Vincent gingerly asked, "Father? In my note to Brigit, may I extend an invitation to visit us? Perhaps a trip here to the Tunnels could be healing for her."
In disbelief, Jacob inquired, "Vincent, do you mean to tell me, BRIGIT knows of our world too?"
Resignedly, Vincent answered, "She does..."
With wonder, Jacob replied, "My Dear boy...you go above, and in one night, you manage to tell every available woman in New York City about us. And what about you? Does Brigit know about your differences as well?"
Admittedly, Vincent again replied, "She does..."
Worriedly Jacob asked, "Oh Vincent, how did that come about? I understood your telling Catherine because of how you feel about her, but what of Brigit...why would you tell her?"
Carefully Vincent explained, "Well Father, because..."
Humbly, and self consciously, Vincent finished in a voice so low, Jacob was unable to hear or understand what he was saying, so with an irritated tone, Jacob asked, "Because why? Why did you say?"
Clearing his throat, Vincent found his nerve, to boldly reveal, "Because of the fact Brigit fancied carrying on a relationship with me, and I had to let her know who I was. I felt it only fair she understood who she had been corresponding with."
Jacob nodded as he saw Vincent's reasoning, and complied, "Yes, I suppose it was the proper thing to do. Still, I must say I am astounded! How do you manage it?"
Clueless, Vincent asked, "Manage?"
To which Jacob stepped toward his son, and with an inquisitive look, asked, "How do you manage to become involved with two women, during the course of one night?"
Upon hearing Jacob's summation, it both surprised, and embarrassed Vincent! And because he was awkwardly humbled, he simply lowered, his eyes, and sat silently waiting for the moment to pass away.
In an attempt to lighten the weight on his son's heavy heart, Jacob then in a contrite sarcastic tone, jested, "Do me a favor Vincent, the next time you go above...do take me with you, perhaps I may pickup a few tips."
Vincent stifled a shy smile, recognizing Jacob's attempt to cheer him, and then asked for a response to his original question by inquiring, "So Father, may I extend the invitation to Brigit?"
With a pouting tone, Jacob said, "Egad! The thought of all these top-siders milling about down here, makes me nervous, however, I suppose trusting her as you evidently do, go ahead...extend the invitation. In fact, thinking on this, I am sure it would be up-lifting to the entire community for such a renowned author to grace our humble home. Do let me know of her reply will you?"
Gratefully, Vincent said, "Thank you Father, I will let you know."
After Jacob made his exit, Vincent then turned his attention to the letter he would write to Brigit. Genteelly he wrote:
Dear Brigit, In writing this note to you, I realize there is little I can say. Your father is finally at peace, and I know that must bring you some comfort.
One day you will be able to let go of the grief that palls over you now, and you will be left...with only the lovely memories you and your father shared over your lifetimes.
Brigit, do not be saddened by the fact those memories may be few, and came at your Father's last moments of life. Some people do not even have that.
You were able to be there for him, and that is a beautiful thing.
At our long awaited meeting, I extended an invitation to you to visit my world. Perhaps a visit here would bring you solace, as peace can be sometimes difficult to find above in your world.
Please know that you are most welcome here. Send word if you desire to do so, and we shall make arrangements for your visit. Sincerely Vincent
Vincent found as he began thinking of someone else's pain, it enabled him to put his own aside for a moment.
However it did return ten-fold, once his thoughts again fell on Catherine, for his heart ached for her.
Looking for some words of comfort, he reached for his beloved copy of "Shakespeare's Sonnets." He searched for words that would speak to his breaking heart. As he opened the book to Sonnet 29, he read:
When in disgrace with Fortune and men's eyes I all alone beweep my outcast state And trouble deaf heaven with my bootless cries, And look upon my self and curse my fate, Wishing me like to one more rich in hope, Featur'd like him, like him with friends possess'd, Desiring this man's art, and that man's scope, With what I most enjoy contented least; Yet in these thoughts my self almost despising, Haply I think on thee, - and then my state, Like to the lark at break of day arising From sullen earth sings hymns at heaven's gate; For thy sweet love remembered such wealth brings, That then I scorn to change my state with kings.
Just as he finished reading the Sonnet, he looked up as Jacob re-entered his chamber, asking, "Vincent?"
Standing to greet his Father, Vincent replied, "Father?"
As Jacob advanced, he replied, "Lin has brought us some provisions, and sadly, also a message from Peter. He wanted us to know he has traveled to be at his dying Mother's side...it is a dire time indeed for him and his family..."
With a reverent concern Vincent expressed, "Ah Peter must be devastated...I know how much he loves his Dear Mother...I am sorry to hear this Father..."
To which Jacob said, "Yes...and I know he was excited about his plan of spending Thanksgiving with her this year...in fact, his whole family was going to travel to be with her...Yes, well the circle of life is a mystery. We never know when ours here on earth ends now do we...Oh, and I must also mention Lin asked if there was anything you needed from above? She would have come to ask you herself, however...I was unsure if you were up to any company."
Noticing Vincent had an open book, Jacob couldn't resist seeing what his son was reading, and when he saw, he chuckled as ne noted, "Still keeping company with old William, uh? Oh my, Vincent! Look at the condition of this book."
Vincent nodded and said, "Yes Father, this book...has been well read."
Informatively Vincent then said with a hint of nostalgia, "It's the first book of Shakespeare you ever gave to me."
Recalling the occasion, Jacob winced, as he lovingly said, " Ah yes, let's see you were twelve, no wait, you were eleven I believe..."
Quickly correcting him, Vincent said, "I was nine, Father."