It Came Upon a Midnight Clear
Meanwhile, Catherine entered the lobby of her apartment building, and as she stomped the snow from her feet, she fumbled for her key to unlock her mail box. She could see through the little window that it was loaded, and after taking a quick glance through the pile of envelopes, she could see much of her mail seemed to be Christmas cards.
This was bittersweet to her, because Catherine loved sending and receiving cards this time of year, but as Christmas was drawing nearer, she knew this was yet another task she was behind on, and so she sighed aloud, "Oh boy, I guess I better get busy."
"What was that dear?" asked Miss Herman, who had overheard Catherine talking to herself.
With embarrassment Catherine smiled at the sweet older lady from the 3rd floor, and explained, "Hi Miss Herman, I guess I was thinking out loud. I just noticed all of the Christmas Cards I received today; and I realized I had better get my cards out this week too. Christmas is coming so fast."
As they entered into the elevator together, Miss Herman commented, "Well everyone knows how busy you have been! Goodness gracious me, just think about it! You had so kindly flew down to attend that nice handsome Doctor Peter Alcott's mother's funeral...and you do know, Dr. Alcott is the one who took out my Gall Bladder."
This comment tickled Catherine, and she tried to hide her smile, because YES, she DID know Peter was the surgeon for this infamous Gall Bladder operation! In fact, Catherine had heard about the whole procedure at least a dozen times now.
And then Miss Herman continued, "And then after you came home from the funeral, you had to fly right back down when your father fell ill! And by the way, thank God he is all right too Dear...food poisoning is no picnic! And now, well now I just heard you left the lucrative firm with your father for that dangerous position at the D.A.! Is that true Dear?"
Knowing she had not had a chance to tell Miss Herman any of these scoops she was privy to, Catherine with wide eyed wonder, said, "Yes...yes it is true."
To which Miss Herman replied, "Well I only hope you don't regret the career change..."
And then without missing a beat, Miss Herman asked, "And speaking of Dr. Alcott, how is he coping since he had to bury his dear sainted mother?"
Thoughtfully, Catherine answered, "As well as can be expected. It has been hard on him."
With a slight jolt, the elevator stopped at the 3rd floor, and as Miss Herman departed Catherine's company, she said, "I can imagine, and this time of year is especially heartrending to suffer the loss of a loved one isn't it? And I know of what I speak, because let's see...my Uncle Felix died on November 29, then the following year, my sister Mamey passed on December 22, and two years later, my cousin Judith, passed on Cinco de Mayo! Oh well I guess maybe she doesn't count, NOT because she was such a strange girl, but being as she was a Spring passing...but my point is shucks, a death around the holidays is testing. Well, give Dr. Alcott my fond regards. Just remind him I am the patient with the beauty mark fashioned like a kidney bean on my right hip! I know he'll remember me. Merry Christmas Dear."
Catherine returned a Merry Christmas, and promised to tell Peter hello for her. And as the door closed, Catherine couldn't help but laugh aloud at all the info the sweet woman had flung at her in a matter of 15 seconds! A Kidney Bean birth mark? Oh my!
Just as she opened the door to her apartment, the phone began to ring. And so Catherine sifted through the mail as she answered the phone, saying, "Hi Dad! Yes, I just got home. Oh look at this! I received a Christmas card from Aunt Elaine and Uncle Douggy today!"
To which Charles replied, he had as well. And then Catherine continued, "Oh it is so sweet, isn't it? Let's see, what Aunt Elaine wrote:
Dearest Cathy,
A big thank you to you, your Dad and your friend Jenny, for showing Robby & Gerty such a great time while in New York City. They are still raving about their visit!
I just finished your Dad's card, and I told him how thankful we all are he is back in the pink. We are planning to visit soon, and are shooting for the week between Christmas & New Year, so we will see you then.
We love you Sweetie
Auntie Elaine, Uncle Douggy,
Gerty and Robby
As Catherine finished reading, she responded, "So it sounds official! Company is coming. How wonderful!"
To which Charles replied, "Yes, Aunt Elaine issued the same warning in my Christmas Card too, and I have already alerted Willie to batten down the hatches!"
Catherine laughed and said, "You can't fool me Dad. I know you love their visits."
As Catherine continued her conversation with her Dad, she leafed through a few more cards, and noticed she was a recipient of the annual Christmas card from the firm!
And so she chided, "Oh, and I see I am now an official member of the firm's "The People we Must Send To List."
In reply, Charles reminded Catherine, "You have always been on the "Send To List" my Dear, always...right at the top."
After reading it, she then sincerely said, "Thanks Dad, its a beautiful card, and I know I have always gotten cards from the firm every Christmas, but this year getting one...I don't know what to say, its different somehow...its very special, AND it looks like you really signed it too. Not just a signature stamp!"
Kindly Charles said she was welcome, but then informed his daughter that he always personally signs the Christmas Cards!
And then with surprise, Charles asked, "You never noticed?"
Ashamedly, Catherine admitted, "I guess there are a lot of things I never noticed before..."
And as she looked down at her Dad's lovely scripted signature, she softly said, "...its so nice of you to take the time to do that Dad."
To which Charles wisely said, "Well, some things are worth taking the time to do...a man's signature means something, especially when its applied to a Christmas Greeting, where there is so much meaning and sentiment attached."
As Catherine listened to her Dad's words of wisdom, she then replied, "I will remember that Dad."
Changing gears, Charles tactfully asked about her first day at the D.A., and so he inquired, "And acknowledging the elephant in the room, how did work go?"
Contemplating how to answer her Dad's question, Catherine knew her Dad was probably hoping she would say it had been a mistake to leave the firm, and ask if she could she come back. And so she wanted to break it gently to him that though she had a few moments of self doubt today, after seeing the lowest of what society has to offer, basically she was sure about making this career change.
Yes it was true, some of the cases that day, did made Catherine wonder if her heart could take the breaking. Would she be able to withstand knowing all these unconscionable, unspeakable deeds were really going on out there? But then, there were the others that made up for them. And she has already felt rewards beyond words, as she helped Paul right some of society's wrongs on a few of the cases today.
So softly she began, "So far so good...the day went fairly smooth, but it does feel odd being the new kid on the block. Although...working side by side with Paul is great, he is so professional, and an excellent mentor, and HE credits you with everything he knows."
Humbly Charles replied, "Paul was top of his class when he came to us to intern, I can't believe there was much I could have told him he didn't already know..."
To which Catherine proudly inserted, "Believe it Dad, those were Paul's exact words. Whether you know it or not, you have set an excellent standard and example for all of us to emulate."
Warmly, and with a bit of emotion, Charles replied, "Well thank you for that Princess."
Changing the subject off of himself, Charles then asked, "And how was Joe? Did you two get along today?"
With a smile, Catherine replied, "Yes, Joe was really pretty nice, and I think you are right, we may be able to start over on new footing. He was even very sensitive and understanding when talking about Steven's case."
Speaking about Steven, Catherine then shared, "Isn't it puzzling, that when you think of all Steven had going for him, he just threw it all away."
Silently Catherine listened as her Dad observed, "We all make our own decisions Cathy, we decide how we wish to live our life, and unfortunately, Steven chose a life of lies and crime."
Tearfully Catherine acknowledged she knew her Dad was right of course. As he always is about people, and his philosophies on this journey called life, were always spot on. And then Catherine thought of how her Dad's retort mirrored Vincent's when they spoke about Steven.
And so meantime, as Charles heard the sadness in his daughters voice, out of his concern for her, he then asked if she felt seeing Steven tomorrow was a wise thing, and did she consider asking to be put on a different case.
To which Catherine carefully answered, "Joe did offer, and although I cannot deny it will be difficult seeing Steven lead around by police officers tomorrow, I thought it was important for me to see this through."
Happy to know his daughter was given an option to opt out of Steven's case, Charles noted, "I guess this Joe Maxwell is not so bad after all."
To which Catherine agreeably said, "Yeah, I guess not."
And because of working with him on Steven's case the other day, Charles replied, "Don't get mad at me Dear Daughter for saying this, but I like Joe."
With a smile, Catherine admitted, "And he likes YOU, so better watch out, I think he wants to recruit you!"
Catherine then admittedly continued, "But I will say, he does seem to be respected, and everyone's "Go To" person. He has to answer to the Police Chief AND Moreno all day long, and seems really passionate about his job! But one thing is clear, he expects nothing but the best from those working under him."
Realizing she was coming on kind of strong talking about her new boss, Catherine toned it down a bit by concluding, "Working there will be a good experience for me Dad, and you yourself have even hinted that I could improve my work ethic."
To which Charles admitted, "Well perhaps so, but its clear now, dedication was lacking only because of where you were at, not because of any lack of character."
Appreciating her Dad's perceptive comment, Catherine humbly added, "Well, I guess what I am saying is, it won't hurt me to think of those less fortunate for a change, instead of the self centered superficial things that used to consume my life before."
In reply, Charles thoughtfully replied, "Well maybe a dose of reality is good for us all. But Cathy, even though you grew up affluent; you were always a compassionate, caring person, even as a small child."
Charles then told Catherine a sweet story about herself, when she was a little girl. And so thoughtfully he relayed, "I'll never forget the time when you were about five years old, and you gave a needy little girl at the park, a Flintstone book you had..."
Giggling, Catherine questioned, "Are you sure it was a Flintstone Book I gave away? It's hard to believe I would have given anything away where the Flintstones were concerned. I loved that cartoon so much, especially little Pebbles!"
To which Charles said he was indeed sure, and said, "That's why your Mother and I were so proud of you...we knew how much you loved that cartoon."
Loving that her Dad would have remembered this incident from such a long time ago, caused Catherine to lovingly say, "Well I guess I must have learned from the selfless examples you and Mom had set for me Dad."
In reply, Charles told his daughter, that he and her mother tried to be exemplary parents for their extremely extraordinary child, whom they loved so very, very much.
After sharing a moment, Catherine cleared her voice of emotion, as she tried to end their conversation on a light note, mentioning she would be stopping by the firm tomorrow, explaining, "I need to pick up my snow boots I left in the closet."
And then Catherine jokingly added, "Unless Harvey had already taken them to the front desk for me. I know how he dislikes clutter!"
After agreeing to that possibility, Charles laughed as he said, "I bet you are not far off Cathy, in fact maybe you better check there first!"!
As this comment made Catherine giggle a bit, it was her Dad's last comment that truly brought a smile to her beautiful face, which was to tell Vincent hello for him when she sees him tonight.
To which in reply, Catherine warmly said, "We hadn't made any plans, but if I do see Vincent tonight, I sure will. Well, good night Dad."
After hanging up, Catherine thoughtfully lifted the picture of her with her Dad, which was taken a few years ago. And Catherine found herself crying without warning, realizing she loved and appreciated her dear Dad more now, than she ever had.
Perhaps it was his loving support about Vincent, or maybe...it was this underlying dread, which has plagued her heart since her Dad became sick in Florida.
Yes, since then, Catherine has been even more aware of how much she loved and needed her Dad still, though she was this grown-up woman.
Wiping the tears away Catherine decided not to borrow tomorrow's sorrow, and just cherish each day she is able to share with her dear, dear Dad.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Meantime, after hanging up his phone, Charles picked up the picture he had been staring at all through his phone conversation with his daughter.
And as he looked at Catherine's toothless grin, he wondered where had the years gone? Seems like only yesterday, Catherine was this 6 years old girl, running up to inform him, she had lost another front toof!
And now, well now Catherine is living on her own, and working on a turf that is separate from his. And it is kind of difficult to accept that his daughter seems to deem the D.A. a more respectable career, than working at the corporate firm.
But hey, they had discussed all these values at length before. Corporate law means working for big companies and is so different than working with individual clients. But though Charles said there would be no hurt feelings if Catherine left the firm, still it was a loss for Charles.
Charles lost the dream of his daughter working side by side with him, becoming a full fledged partner in time. And Charles had to accept that there would never be a Chandler & Chandler shingle hanging on the door.
And as Charles sat there, he realized because of his daughter's unconventional relationship with Vincent, he lost another dream as well. His dream of walking his beautiful daughter down the aisle to her waiting betrothal, in front of God, family and friend's to witness.
And then Charles questioned, if he was right to advise his daughter to follow her heart? Was Charles right to trust Vincent so unconditionally? But in promising to respect Catherine's judgment, MEANS trusting Vincent. Still was Catherine truly aware of what it entails being in this relationship, and all she will be giving up?
Charles believes Catherine does, but she is newly in love, and any sacrifice is romanticized right now. But what about in a few years? Will his daughter resent him later on for not giving her a Dad's perspective?
Yet still...though Charles admitted to himself, that both these issues pained him much, Charles still felt there was a heaviness in his heart remaining.
And so delving a little deeper, he finally felt an affirmation, as he laid his finger on the nagging, heart tugging culprit.
And the culprit seemed to be, that there will be no offspring from his only child.
And though they had broached the subject before, Charles couldn't help but wonder if Catherine truly does realize there will be no one to carry on her dear late mother's lineage if she has no children? And at the risk of being narcissistic, no one to carry on his own?
How it pained him wondering if he should say more about this subject. Being the good man he was, Charles knew this was about more than facing his own mortality, but was truly about his wife and daughter's. If Catherine has no children, then both Catherine and his wife will be truly gone from this earth forever one day, and there will be no one left to keep any part of them alive, and he was finding this truth a difficult thought for him to bear.
So in a private moment of prayer, his faith snapped him out of his lonely downward spiral, realizing he may never know these answers...and accepting the fact that some things are simply out of his control.
And then Charles found peace in knowing he must do what every parent must one day do...and that is...allow your child to live their own life.
And so that is what Charles would do, give his child the gift of silent self-sacrifice, and this he would do so lovingly for his daughter.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Meanwhile, Catherine took a much needed, stress relieving shower, before settling in with the last bowlful of Willie's Veggie soup, the soul remaining muffin, and Perry Como's Christmas album.
Sitting on her bed with her fine dining before her, Catherine went through the rest of her Christmas cards she received that day, and noticed there was one from Brigit!
Excitedly she opened, and was pleased to read that Brigit had written another Children's book, and it was now available to order! And the name of the book is called "A place for the forgotten Children" which Brigit explained, was influenced by the tunnels.
And though the tunnels were her inspiration, not to worry, as she does not betray any confidences in her book.
And then Brigit confessed, she has recently discovered, that though she loves children, she is much better relating to children through her writing, than she is face to face. And then added, tis good to know things about yourself, not every woman is meant to be a mother...
Catherine then finished up reading, and was struck by the sentimental impacted words Brigit signed off with, which was "Merry Christmas to my Dear Dear new friend, and a Blessed New Year too."
Yes, Catherine indeed felt warmed by Brigit's words, and as she looked on the envelope, she was pleased to see there was a return address, to which she could reciprocate with a Christmas card of her own.
And then Catherine contemplated, and decided...she would be placing a book order straight a way!
Setting her cards in a place for immediate response on her desk, Catherine then readied herself to do what she had been putting off. And so she picked up Steven's case file, and began to read through the many documents, updating herself on the newly compiled background info on him.
But all the while Catherine read and researched, she thought of Vincent, hoping he would come to see her tonight.
To be continued
Chapter Four
: }
Meanwhile, Catherine entered the lobby of her apartment building, and as she stomped the snow from her feet, she fumbled for her key to unlock her mail box. She could see through the little window that it was loaded, and after taking a quick glance through the pile of envelopes, she could see much of her mail seemed to be Christmas cards.
This was bittersweet to her, because Catherine loved sending and receiving cards this time of year, but as Christmas was drawing nearer, she knew this was yet another task she was behind on, and so she sighed aloud, "Oh boy, I guess I better get busy."
"What was that dear?" asked Miss Herman, who had overheard Catherine talking to herself.
With embarrassment Catherine smiled at the sweet older lady from the 3rd floor, and explained, "Hi Miss Herman, I guess I was thinking out loud. I just noticed all of the Christmas Cards I received today; and I realized I had better get my cards out this week too. Christmas is coming so fast."
As they entered into the elevator together, Miss Herman commented, "Well everyone knows how busy you have been! Goodness gracious me, just think about it! You had so kindly flew down to attend that nice handsome Doctor Peter Alcott's mother's funeral...and you do know, Dr. Alcott is the one who took out my Gall Bladder."
This comment tickled Catherine, and she tried to hide her smile, because YES, she DID know Peter was the surgeon for this infamous Gall Bladder operation! In fact, Catherine had heard about the whole procedure at least a dozen times now.
And then Miss Herman continued, "And then after you came home from the funeral, you had to fly right back down when your father fell ill! And by the way, thank God he is all right too Dear...food poisoning is no picnic! And now, well now I just heard you left the lucrative firm with your father for that dangerous position at the D.A.! Is that true Dear?"
Knowing she had not had a chance to tell Miss Herman any of these scoops she was privy to, Catherine with wide eyed wonder, said, "Yes...yes it is true."
To which Miss Herman replied, "Well I only hope you don't regret the career change..."
And then without missing a beat, Miss Herman asked, "And speaking of Dr. Alcott, how is he coping since he had to bury his dear sainted mother?"
Thoughtfully, Catherine answered, "As well as can be expected. It has been hard on him."
With a slight jolt, the elevator stopped at the 3rd floor, and as Miss Herman departed Catherine's company, she said, "I can imagine, and this time of year is especially heartrending to suffer the loss of a loved one isn't it? And I know of what I speak, because let's see...my Uncle Felix died on November 29, then the following year, my sister Mamey passed on December 22, and two years later, my cousin Judith, passed on Cinco de Mayo! Oh well I guess maybe she doesn't count, NOT because she was such a strange girl, but being as she was a Spring passing...but my point is shucks, a death around the holidays is testing. Well, give Dr. Alcott my fond regards. Just remind him I am the patient with the beauty mark fashioned like a kidney bean on my right hip! I know he'll remember me. Merry Christmas Dear."
Catherine returned a Merry Christmas, and promised to tell Peter hello for her. And as the door closed, Catherine couldn't help but laugh aloud at all the info the sweet woman had flung at her in a matter of 15 seconds! A Kidney Bean birth mark? Oh my!
Just as she opened the door to her apartment, the phone began to ring. And so Catherine sifted through the mail as she answered the phone, saying, "Hi Dad! Yes, I just got home. Oh look at this! I received a Christmas card from Aunt Elaine and Uncle Douggy today!"
To which Charles replied, he had as well. And then Catherine continued, "Oh it is so sweet, isn't it? Let's see, what Aunt Elaine wrote:
Dearest Cathy,
A big thank you to you, your Dad and your friend Jenny, for showing Robby & Gerty such a great time while in New York City. They are still raving about their visit!
I just finished your Dad's card, and I told him how thankful we all are he is back in the pink. We are planning to visit soon, and are shooting for the week between Christmas & New Year, so we will see you then.
We love you Sweetie
Auntie Elaine, Uncle Douggy,
Gerty and Robby
As Catherine finished reading, she responded, "So it sounds official! Company is coming. How wonderful!"
To which Charles replied, "Yes, Aunt Elaine issued the same warning in my Christmas Card too, and I have already alerted Willie to batten down the hatches!"
Catherine laughed and said, "You can't fool me Dad. I know you love their visits."
As Catherine continued her conversation with her Dad, she leafed through a few more cards, and noticed she was a recipient of the annual Christmas card from the firm!
And so she chided, "Oh, and I see I am now an official member of the firm's "The People we Must Send To List."
In reply, Charles reminded Catherine, "You have always been on the "Send To List" my Dear, always...right at the top."
After reading it, she then sincerely said, "Thanks Dad, its a beautiful card, and I know I have always gotten cards from the firm every Christmas, but this year getting one...I don't know what to say, its different somehow...its very special, AND it looks like you really signed it too. Not just a signature stamp!"
Kindly Charles said she was welcome, but then informed his daughter that he always personally signs the Christmas Cards!
And then with surprise, Charles asked, "You never noticed?"
Ashamedly, Catherine admitted, "I guess there are a lot of things I never noticed before..."
And as she looked down at her Dad's lovely scripted signature, she softly said, "...its so nice of you to take the time to do that Dad."
To which Charles wisely said, "Well, some things are worth taking the time to do...a man's signature means something, especially when its applied to a Christmas Greeting, where there is so much meaning and sentiment attached."
As Catherine listened to her Dad's words of wisdom, she then replied, "I will remember that Dad."
Changing gears, Charles tactfully asked about her first day at the D.A., and so he inquired, "And acknowledging the elephant in the room, how did work go?"
Contemplating how to answer her Dad's question, Catherine knew her Dad was probably hoping she would say it had been a mistake to leave the firm, and ask if she could she come back. And so she wanted to break it gently to him that though she had a few moments of self doubt today, after seeing the lowest of what society has to offer, basically she was sure about making this career change.
Yes it was true, some of the cases that day, did made Catherine wonder if her heart could take the breaking. Would she be able to withstand knowing all these unconscionable, unspeakable deeds were really going on out there? But then, there were the others that made up for them. And she has already felt rewards beyond words, as she helped Paul right some of society's wrongs on a few of the cases today.
So softly she began, "So far so good...the day went fairly smooth, but it does feel odd being the new kid on the block. Although...working side by side with Paul is great, he is so professional, and an excellent mentor, and HE credits you with everything he knows."
Humbly Charles replied, "Paul was top of his class when he came to us to intern, I can't believe there was much I could have told him he didn't already know..."
To which Catherine proudly inserted, "Believe it Dad, those were Paul's exact words. Whether you know it or not, you have set an excellent standard and example for all of us to emulate."
Warmly, and with a bit of emotion, Charles replied, "Well thank you for that Princess."
Changing the subject off of himself, Charles then asked, "And how was Joe? Did you two get along today?"
With a smile, Catherine replied, "Yes, Joe was really pretty nice, and I think you are right, we may be able to start over on new footing. He was even very sensitive and understanding when talking about Steven's case."
Speaking about Steven, Catherine then shared, "Isn't it puzzling, that when you think of all Steven had going for him, he just threw it all away."
Silently Catherine listened as her Dad observed, "We all make our own decisions Cathy, we decide how we wish to live our life, and unfortunately, Steven chose a life of lies and crime."
Tearfully Catherine acknowledged she knew her Dad was right of course. As he always is about people, and his philosophies on this journey called life, were always spot on. And then Catherine thought of how her Dad's retort mirrored Vincent's when they spoke about Steven.
And so meantime, as Charles heard the sadness in his daughters voice, out of his concern for her, he then asked if she felt seeing Steven tomorrow was a wise thing, and did she consider asking to be put on a different case.
To which Catherine carefully answered, "Joe did offer, and although I cannot deny it will be difficult seeing Steven lead around by police officers tomorrow, I thought it was important for me to see this through."
Happy to know his daughter was given an option to opt out of Steven's case, Charles noted, "I guess this Joe Maxwell is not so bad after all."
To which Catherine agreeably said, "Yeah, I guess not."
And because of working with him on Steven's case the other day, Charles replied, "Don't get mad at me Dear Daughter for saying this, but I like Joe."
With a smile, Catherine admitted, "And he likes YOU, so better watch out, I think he wants to recruit you!"
Catherine then admittedly continued, "But I will say, he does seem to be respected, and everyone's "Go To" person. He has to answer to the Police Chief AND Moreno all day long, and seems really passionate about his job! But one thing is clear, he expects nothing but the best from those working under him."
Realizing she was coming on kind of strong talking about her new boss, Catherine toned it down a bit by concluding, "Working there will be a good experience for me Dad, and you yourself have even hinted that I could improve my work ethic."
To which Charles admitted, "Well perhaps so, but its clear now, dedication was lacking only because of where you were at, not because of any lack of character."
Appreciating her Dad's perceptive comment, Catherine humbly added, "Well, I guess what I am saying is, it won't hurt me to think of those less fortunate for a change, instead of the self centered superficial things that used to consume my life before."
In reply, Charles thoughtfully replied, "Well maybe a dose of reality is good for us all. But Cathy, even though you grew up affluent; you were always a compassionate, caring person, even as a small child."
Charles then told Catherine a sweet story about herself, when she was a little girl. And so thoughtfully he relayed, "I'll never forget the time when you were about five years old, and you gave a needy little girl at the park, a Flintstone book you had..."
Giggling, Catherine questioned, "Are you sure it was a Flintstone Book I gave away? It's hard to believe I would have given anything away where the Flintstones were concerned. I loved that cartoon so much, especially little Pebbles!"
To which Charles said he was indeed sure, and said, "That's why your Mother and I were so proud of you...we knew how much you loved that cartoon."
Loving that her Dad would have remembered this incident from such a long time ago, caused Catherine to lovingly say, "Well I guess I must have learned from the selfless examples you and Mom had set for me Dad."
In reply, Charles told his daughter, that he and her mother tried to be exemplary parents for their extremely extraordinary child, whom they loved so very, very much.
After sharing a moment, Catherine cleared her voice of emotion, as she tried to end their conversation on a light note, mentioning she would be stopping by the firm tomorrow, explaining, "I need to pick up my snow boots I left in the closet."
And then Catherine jokingly added, "Unless Harvey had already taken them to the front desk for me. I know how he dislikes clutter!"
After agreeing to that possibility, Charles laughed as he said, "I bet you are not far off Cathy, in fact maybe you better check there first!"!
As this comment made Catherine giggle a bit, it was her Dad's last comment that truly brought a smile to her beautiful face, which was to tell Vincent hello for him when she sees him tonight.
To which in reply, Catherine warmly said, "We hadn't made any plans, but if I do see Vincent tonight, I sure will. Well, good night Dad."
After hanging up, Catherine thoughtfully lifted the picture of her with her Dad, which was taken a few years ago. And Catherine found herself crying without warning, realizing she loved and appreciated her dear Dad more now, than she ever had.
Perhaps it was his loving support about Vincent, or maybe...it was this underlying dread, which has plagued her heart since her Dad became sick in Florida.
Yes, since then, Catherine has been even more aware of how much she loved and needed her Dad still, though she was this grown-up woman.
Wiping the tears away Catherine decided not to borrow tomorrow's sorrow, and just cherish each day she is able to share with her dear, dear Dad.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Meantime, after hanging up his phone, Charles picked up the picture he had been staring at all through his phone conversation with his daughter.
And as he looked at Catherine's toothless grin, he wondered where had the years gone? Seems like only yesterday, Catherine was this 6 years old girl, running up to inform him, she had lost another front toof!
And now, well now Catherine is living on her own, and working on a turf that is separate from his. And it is kind of difficult to accept that his daughter seems to deem the D.A. a more respectable career, than working at the corporate firm.
But hey, they had discussed all these values at length before. Corporate law means working for big companies and is so different than working with individual clients. But though Charles said there would be no hurt feelings if Catherine left the firm, still it was a loss for Charles.
Charles lost the dream of his daughter working side by side with him, becoming a full fledged partner in time. And Charles had to accept that there would never be a Chandler & Chandler shingle hanging on the door.
And as Charles sat there, he realized because of his daughter's unconventional relationship with Vincent, he lost another dream as well. His dream of walking his beautiful daughter down the aisle to her waiting betrothal, in front of God, family and friend's to witness.
And then Charles questioned, if he was right to advise his daughter to follow her heart? Was Charles right to trust Vincent so unconditionally? But in promising to respect Catherine's judgment, MEANS trusting Vincent. Still was Catherine truly aware of what it entails being in this relationship, and all she will be giving up?
Charles believes Catherine does, but she is newly in love, and any sacrifice is romanticized right now. But what about in a few years? Will his daughter resent him later on for not giving her a Dad's perspective?
Yet still...though Charles admitted to himself, that both these issues pained him much, Charles still felt there was a heaviness in his heart remaining.
And so delving a little deeper, he finally felt an affirmation, as he laid his finger on the nagging, heart tugging culprit.
And the culprit seemed to be, that there will be no offspring from his only child.
And though they had broached the subject before, Charles couldn't help but wonder if Catherine truly does realize there will be no one to carry on her dear late mother's lineage if she has no children? And at the risk of being narcissistic, no one to carry on his own?
How it pained him wondering if he should say more about this subject. Being the good man he was, Charles knew this was about more than facing his own mortality, but was truly about his wife and daughter's. If Catherine has no children, then both Catherine and his wife will be truly gone from this earth forever one day, and there will be no one left to keep any part of them alive, and he was finding this truth a difficult thought for him to bear.
So in a private moment of prayer, his faith snapped him out of his lonely downward spiral, realizing he may never know these answers...and accepting the fact that some things are simply out of his control.
And then Charles found peace in knowing he must do what every parent must one day do...and that is...allow your child to live their own life.
And so that is what Charles would do, give his child the gift of silent self-sacrifice, and this he would do so lovingly for his daughter.
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Meanwhile, Catherine took a much needed, stress relieving shower, before settling in with the last bowlful of Willie's Veggie soup, the soul remaining muffin, and Perry Como's Christmas album.
Sitting on her bed with her fine dining before her, Catherine went through the rest of her Christmas cards she received that day, and noticed there was one from Brigit!
Excitedly she opened, and was pleased to read that Brigit had written another Children's book, and it was now available to order! And the name of the book is called "A place for the forgotten Children" which Brigit explained, was influenced by the tunnels.
And though the tunnels were her inspiration, not to worry, as she does not betray any confidences in her book.
And then Brigit confessed, she has recently discovered, that though she loves children, she is much better relating to children through her writing, than she is face to face. And then added, tis good to know things about yourself, not every woman is meant to be a mother...
Catherine then finished up reading, and was struck by the sentimental impacted words Brigit signed off with, which was "Merry Christmas to my Dear Dear new friend, and a Blessed New Year too."
Yes, Catherine indeed felt warmed by Brigit's words, and as she looked on the envelope, she was pleased to see there was a return address, to which she could reciprocate with a Christmas card of her own.
And then Catherine contemplated, and decided...she would be placing a book order straight a way!
Setting her cards in a place for immediate response on her desk, Catherine then readied herself to do what she had been putting off. And so she picked up Steven's case file, and began to read through the many documents, updating herself on the newly compiled background info on him.
But all the while Catherine read and researched, she thought of Vincent, hoping he would come to see her tonight.
To be continued
Chapter Four
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| Destiny of my Heart! By Sharon Holtz Chapter Three ___________________________________ |
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Dearest Cathy,
A big thank you to you, your Dad and your friend Jennifer, for showing Robby & Gerty such a great time while in New York City. They are still raving about their visit!
I just finished your Dad's card, and I told him how thankful we all are he is back in the pink. We are planning to visit soon, and are shooting for the week between Christmas & New Year, so we will see you then.
We love you Sweetie
Auntie Elaine, Uncle Douggy,
Gerty and Robby
| bbb |
| Merry Christmas! |